i just realized that i haven't written in a long time. and i don't mean just writing in general - i mean writing as in writing stories and poems. i was reading someone else's posts last night, and i realized how much i missed doing that too. sure, it's nice to read technical papers and textbooks but writing stories is something...special, and different.

it's like music. it can take you out of this world and into another one and when you come back to the original world, you can't help but think what a loss it was to have to come back. yesterday i was sitting at my desk and Copland's Third Symphony came up on my playlist, and I literally just sat there staring blankly at my screen for the next 45 minutes, pretending to do work, while just...listening. how does it work? how do you put notes together in such a way to make them come together in such a beautiful format? i almost couldn't stand it when the brass fanfare came up in the beginning of the fourth movement - it was all too gorgeous and incredible to be real. i remember when we played this piece for MITSO and the concert was absolutely amazing especially at this part. the brass loved it. all of them would stay after rehearsal and just play that part over and over again. and then they'd finish and the rest of us would finish packing up our instruments and we would leave, still humming that portion in our heads the rest of the night.

how do you express it? how many people in the world can you really express to about how much you love music, and how many of them will understand?